Sunday, April 8, 2012

That's Got a Ring To It

So, Geo left tonight. He was here for a blissful like 1 hour and then he left. So, I'm here, sans Geo. Drinking wine and periodically deciding whether or not I'm sad or happy. Is there anything more hilarious than reading about a chick who is drinking and sad?!

Yeah, so Geo got here Friday night, we hung out with friends and drank beer. Later, we spent Easter with my family and had good ol' fashioned family time. The poor guy spent a lot of hours talking with women who are PUMPED about a wedding. And he came through, relatively unscathed.

Before all that fancy girl talk, Geo was the best sport ever and we went looking at wedding bands.

One? This process is actually fun for NO ONE. I started sweating when the 4th of 7 staff members asked me "what I was looking for". I was all "Um, well, something with emeralds. I LOVE green and I want emeralds."

Six of seven women told me I couldn't have emeralds in a wedding band. The seventh simply laughed in my sweaty face. "They're too weak. Emeralds chip under intense heat. You can't have them in something you wear every day. No biggie, even though all your dreams are dashed." Ouch, that felt personal...

Geo kept comparing the rings to how many Mac computers I could buy. "Well, would you rather have a new Mac Book Pro or a wedding ring?" I said "Well, based on the intensity with which Apple updates their products, I think emeralds and diamonds are lower maintenance. And also? EFF YOU! I want the jewelry!"

We looked at things under microscopes. I had roughly the same amount of interest in that scientific process as I did the time my 5th grade science teacher made me look at my fingernails under the microscope. He was intent on teaching my generation that we should not bite our fingernails. I didn't get it. It was all sciency so I didn't get it.

But the rings at the store? So SPARKLY!!!

Anyway, every time I was all "Well, let's get to Banana Republic and think about this," some other salesperson would pop in to tell me what great taste I had and how "NOW was the time to BUY!" SO ANNOYING. I'm pretty sure that when someone wants to buy a freaking WEDDING BAND, they don't need some hard-nosed, transparent sales tactic. They want to go in and be all "Hey, the wedding is next weekend, so show me whatcha got." Idiots.

Despite the fun I had dripping my finger in diamonds while Geo laughed silently to himself and rethought the whole proposal thing, I got super bummed when he left tonight. I got all excited hanging out with him and having fun again that having him leave so quickly just hurt. You guys? We even coordinated SPREADSHEETS. Can you believe that? A man, a woman and a spreadsheet. True love.

In Geo's absence, I'll just go ahead and cry my way through a very elaborate PowerPoint presentation. Sure you can say I'm crazy, but no one will ever call me disorganized...

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