There's GOTTA Be a Better Way!

Are your muscles sore? Does your hair look like a rat's nest? And what HAPPENED to that dewy glow of your skin? You COULD spend thousands of dollars on a full day of spa treatments, but who's got the money OR the time?!

Now from Borrowed Kin, the company who brought you Nap Assist, comes a new product guaranteed to save you time AND money! Why spend money in treatments and tipping when you could get...

A Kid!

That's right, A Kid is guaranteed to slash your beautification regiment costs. And for a limited time, you can get A Kid in one easy payment of Babysitting!

Who needs a masseur when A Kid will GLADLY walk up and down your back, massaging sore muscles, for hours? A Kid digs their tiny little toes into all the nooks and crannies and works out all the stress. All the while, you can LAY on the FLOOR watching your favorite episodes of Happy Endings!

And have you ever felt like there was just NO TIME to tend to your hair? The frizzy mess has been neglected and it's starting to show. But with A Kid, you can play "Salon" and let their delicate little fingers gently unsnarl your hair with ease! A Kid will spend an hour just pretending they can braid, while simultaneously working out the kinks in your nasty 'do. With little effort, you can also have A Kid gently massage your scalp by telling them that that's how you start a braid. They won't know that that's a lie! A Kid is easy to trick!

Order now, and we'll add in our bonus facial treatment! That facial that you have been putting off can be tended to by using the Mini Kid! The Mini Kid is a smaller version of A Kid. Just by holding The Mini Kid in your arms, you too can get the dewy, healthy glow you haven't had since you started drinking so much. The Mini Kid is happy to drool all over your face and their hands, spreading it around like finger paint. Have you started taking vitamins?! No! You've got A Mini Kid!

These home spa products come in three sizes: The large Kid is roughly the size of a six-year-old child. It's perfect for the hair treatments! The medium Kid is about the size of a three-year-old child and works best if used to walk on your back. The Mini Kid weighs in at about a 10-month-old baby. Call now and we'll include all three!

So who needs expensive oils and a judgmental salon worker who just wants to chat? With A Kid and Mini Kid, you too can get the fresh and healthy look of women who spend HOURS in bathrooms and salon chairs.

For a limited time, we'll let you babysit these products for four short hours, and you'll see results immediately! Order yours today!