Dear Crabby

Well dudes, count yourselves among the lucky. I am officially off work until Monday, and still I blog. I know what can happen when a week goes by without help from Crabby. So awaaaaaay we go!

Dear Crabby,

I'm trying to find a tasteful way of telling my boyfriend he needs to, um, tend to the hair on his shoulders. How can I do that tactfully?

Thank you!!!!
Hairless in Hopkins

Hey HIH,

My suggestion is to just tell him to shave it if that's what you want. Me? I like to hang out with people who can grow hair on body parts that I can't. It's like hanging out with an alien. Another approach would be to casually start braiding his shoulder hair and tell him you think it's "pretty" when he asks what you're doing. He'll make it disappear post-haste!

Dear Crabby,

I've set my New Year's Resolution and I'm sticking to it!!! I've got a goal of losing 40 pounds this year. Any tips????

Thanks Crabbers!
-Fatty Fat Fat

Well hello there, FFF,
My advice is to either 1) discover a miracle weight-loss drug that does not kill people or 2) eat "right" and "exercise". That's what I've been told to do. Allegedly, it's a pretty easy thing to do. Carrots instead of cheese sticks?! No Way! I know, I know...but it'll help, I swear.

Listen guys, there are loads more questions that I have chosen to dismiss this week because I'm incredibly tired. I love you all, and I'm so glad you submit them every week to pharonsquare@gmail.com but two questions is all I can muster this week. Fear not! I will help TWICE as many people next week, okay? I'll catch you all on the flipside, k?