Stupid banks and their stupid security measures. Okay, so thanks for protecting me from all those identity thieves and everything, but protecting me from MYSELF is infuriating. I just had a string of bad luck that rivals that whiny little Alexander kid. It all started with a very routine trip to the ATM. La la la, I get my cash and stroll out of the gas station. La la la, happy as a clam. I paid no attention to the allegedly loud beeping sound that was allegedly alerting me to something. Whatevs. I was too busy going about my business happy and care-free.
Cut to the check out line at Ragstock. Perek, Kim and I went to pick up some AWESOME zombie costumes for the upcoming Zombie Pub Crawl this weekend. Everything was going swimmingly. I got my outfit, my jug of fake blood, and I start going through my wallet looking for my check card.
Spoiler Alert: It wasn't in my wallet, my purse, or my pockets.
So I trace my steps and mentally end up at that stupid gas station, strolling away from the beeping ATM. D'OH! So, I call the bank and I'm all "I think I left my card in an ATM. What do I do?" She's all "Oh, just go into the branch..." "Hold up, lady." I protest, "I wasn't at a branch. I was at an ATM at the gas station." She breaks the news that alas, there is nothing she can do for me except cancel the card. I decide to give myself the benefit of the doubt and hope that it's in my car.
Spoiler Alert: It wasn't in my car.
So I'm freaking out. Kim generously pays for my zombie gear, and Perek covers my dinner tab. I suddenly remember - as I'm chowing down on my spicy garlic wings - I have an EXTRA check card! Long story short, I had mistakenly requested another one last year. I decide to calm down and that I'll just bop home and find the spare and it will be all good.
Spoiler Alert: I couldn't find the stupid card.
I tore my room apart. I saved bank statements and old phone bills from a bajillion years ago, but apparently, I had destroyed the card in the shredder before my move. UGH. So, I call the bank. Yes, I need to cancel my card. Yes, I'd like to order another one. I would also very much love it if you could get it to me tomorrow.
Spoiler Alert: It will not arrive tomorrow.
I can't get a new card over the phone because I have moved recently so I have to go into a bank branch to get one. I found a very old ATM card (which I had kept, but not the check card) and I thought "Hey, I'll just use this for a couple days! But can I get a reminder on my PIN?" No, I cannot get a reminder, because I need to go in to a branch in person to do that.
Okay, bank lady, so what exactly CAN you do for me? Nothing? Great. Thanks for that.
Claire and Kim both tried to help me by reciting a number of calming reassurances and helpful suggestions. But what's worse than losing your check card, remembering too late that you shredded the old one, being on hold with the bank, then getting NO resolution? Someone telling you to calm down.
Now I have no lunch for tomorrow (unless people still take checks. Do they? With my luck, probably not). No emergency cash, or access to cash, and I have to go INSIDE a bank tomorrow? UGGGHHHH. It's all just very, very annoying and frustrating.
Meanwhile, on our way home from the mall, I was dropping Perek off at his house. We're listening to the radio, and all of a sudden Perek is on his phone asking "Am I the fifth caller?" I was all "Whaaaa? Who are you talking to?" Turns out, Perek randomly called the radio station we were tuned to and won a CD or something. He's all "Ha! That was lucky!"
Yeah. Reeeeeeal lucky.
No comments:
Post a Comment