Monday, February 18, 2013


I have this really bad habit of wanting to have a very hardcore opinion on things that I have no knowledge of. I told my friend Claire tonight that I wanted to write a blog on stay-at-home moms, bone marrow, film-making or getting high traffic levels to a blog written by scatter-brained young ladies. She casually pointed out that I know nothing about any of these topics, so I reluctantly decided to abandon them. But how many things do I really understand enough to write about?

It got me thinking: Why would people read this blog? I mean, I know everything about celebrity relationships and Lil' Wayne lyrics, but I have hit a plateau, ya'll. There is only so much you can write about hating the Kardashians and Angelina Jolie before people are like "We get it. You hate fame-whores and vampires and love everyone who rhymes anything with Tunechi. What's next?"

A few weeks ago, I decided to stop trying to write blogs five times a week. If I'm being honest, it got way too hard to develop creative and funny blogs that were not offensive, and that I was proud of, that many times a week. Especially knowing that it wouldn't go much further than the ones and twos millions of people who tune in every day. I got discouraged. I got frustrated. I wanted people to be all "I have GOT to share this blog. She really gets it/has no idea what she's talking about." But there is very little sharing. Still, that's not even the hardest part.

It's been hard because people started reading way too much into some of the posts. I'd like to think I don't dump on anything on this blog (unless you are a Kardashian or one of those amorphic Jolie-Pitt children) without purpose. I'd like to think that every night, I spend some time pulling my act together enough to promote things like my use of cat gates or my love of Gypsy Sisters on TLC (OMG. BEST SHOW EVER.) But it's getting really difficult. It's getting hard because I would like to think that people read this blog and recognize that I enjoy writing from my own perspective and that every one, and every topic, is fair game because I'm a person who - like everyone else - has opinions. I have just chosen to put those opinions online. But there is increasing pressure not to offend people, which is hard, especially because I thrive on judging and disliking anyone who does things I don't understand, which has proven to be amusing to lots of people.

I'm not sure what to do here. I've gotten to the point where everything I want to write (see above list of things I simply refuse to understand) runs the risk of mildly offending some people. Part of me is very sensitive to this. The other part of me is very INSENSITIVE to this. How long can I just write politically and personally correct material? I read an interview with Lena Dunham's dad recently, where he said "Anyone who is making anything interesting isn't making it for their parents." In my interpretation of this quote, I don't just think it applies to parents. As it relates to me, it has more to do with anyone I know in real life who is like "Was that blog about me? Why would you say that about me?" It's not fair. To me. I want to complain about people or situations as much as I want without any sort of repercussion. Is that so hard? I mean, I would never target a person in my life specifically, but no one is perfect and chances are there are things about people, who I love, that are imperfect and prove to be great blog fodder. Don't people have the same sense of humor about themselves that I have about myself? Lighten up!

I think this is maybe the difficulty that women, and maybe men (I don't know, though, since I'm not a man), have when it comes to sharing themselves with the public. They aren't allowed to offend anyone, but they are supposed to be funny, entertaining and interesting. That's effing hard, you guys. It's really crazy hard. Plus, I simply HAVE to stop only making fun of myself, because it's starting to pummel my self esteem. And it is my firm belief that people who read this blog should try and grow a thicker skin. If I can talk nonstop about how I'm overweight and neurotic and insane and still not be offended, the least you can do is not get offended when I talk about reasons x, y or z why you may or may not also be crazy.

That's all. Sorry for the vent. But this is a blog, and it's mine and yeah.


JessiferSeabs said...

I've written several blogs over the years, and they were A LOT BETTER when nobody I knew in real life knew about them. :-)

Pharon Square said...

I hear that, Jess! Maybe I'll start a blog under a pseudonym...oh the freedom of not having to be held accountable! :)