Thursday, March 1, 2012

pwnd

So last night, I had my book club. It was fun, as usual, but something very disturbing happened. Two of the girls in my club are engaged. While I couldn't be more excited for them, I was seriously caught off guard when each of them showed me their beautiful rings.

They were EXACTLY the ones I thought I had always wanted.

Seeing two replicas of my dream ring rocked me to my core. How could OTHER PEOPLE have the same thing I thought I wanted? RUDE, right?! Well, I've changed my ring preferences, so as not to be a copycat, and pinned pictures accordingly.

To prevent further confusion, I would hereby like to make a list of things that I thought of first (at least to my knowledge) and therefore OWN. I don't care if other people also do/think/hate/like the same things, I am officially claiming the following things as original actions/thoughts/hates/likes because I came to them in my own crazy mind. Consider this my patent application...

* Hating Angelina Jolie
* Loving Nelly Furtado
* Adult braids
* The color green
* Kate Spade - no one will ever love her/her products like I do...NO ONE
* A baby boy name (I'd be crazy to publicize it)
* A baby girl name (Again...not telling)
* Laughing Cow cheese
* The show Happy Endings
* Feminist Ryan Gosling sites
* Pillows made out of fur
* Futurama
* Scarves with words on them
* Liking bald men (a la that Gwen Stefani in her music video with Moby)
* Being a square white chick who totally gets Lil Wayne
* Ke$ha
* Re-appreciating Britney Spears (a.k.a. never NOT appreciating Britney)
* Dance Central
* Charlie Hunnam
* Game of Thrones
* Bagels
* Jem and the Holograms
* The Amish
* Seeing right through the "gluten free" fad
* Coors Light (I'll share this claim with my dear and wonderful friends Madeline and Kelly)
* Fur
* Hating jeggings
* The color grey
* Kickboxing
* Using l33t speak...ironically
* British car shows

That's all I can think of right now. All these things/ideas/preferences hereby belong to me. Get it? Got it? GOOD.

3 comments:

Kelly said...

OMG, you have time for a book club? I'm jealous.

Pharon Square said...

Well Kelly, we can't ALL be nurses/business owners/soon-to-be-mothers. Leave some activities for the rest of us, wouldja?!

Madeline Solien said...

#1-- I totally just said "Thank you" out loud, at the library, while pointing at the screen when I saw the Coors Light note...
#2- Kelly, if that was a passive aggressive attempt to remind us how awesome you are, I'm not having it..mainly because the whole married-preggo-i've got a super cute store-and can save people-thing really leaves me with the "Boo Hoo, poor Kelly" sarcastic face on that I just simply can't control. That being said, I will drink a Coors Light in honor of both of you.