Sioux Falls: The Hollywood of South Dakota

Finally! The first snowfall in Minnesota, and I MISSED IT! I missed the whole thing because I was lounging around in South Dakota at Geo’s family cabin. Perek, Geo, Mitch, Chad, Chad’s girlfriend Angie, and I trekked into the untamed wilderness for fun times and drinking. It was definitely a great break from the stress and monotony of the Cities. We played Trivial Pursuit and Sega and ate nothing but junk food. I got a healthy dose of ribbing from the guys, and Angie and I helped them execute a wine tasting challenge for their pod cast, Good Guys to Know. I haven’t laughed that hard in too long. My stomach still hurts.

So, Saturday morning, Geo gets a call from his dad. We were all sitting around this cheesy little malt shop diner place for breakfast, and Geo informed us that his dad has a guy who works for him that has a limo. And said man would be willing to drive us around that night if we felt like going into Sioux Falls for a night on the town. After some half-hearted debating, we decided that this was too good of a chance to pass up. At 8:30, our driver Darryl rolled up to the cabin in the “limo”. We walked out with a cooler of adult beverages and saw this black, like long station wagon. I was getting stoked to stick my head through a sunroof in the sub-zero chill, but there was no sun roof. It had six doors and three rows of seats. The back two rows all faced forward, so it wasn’t quite the Limo I am accustomed to (if you call riding in a limo for high school prom and for my sister’s wedding being “accustomed” to limos).

While we were making our way the 45 minutes to Sioux Falls in the limo, we decided to take advantage of the whole limo thing. I had sunglasses in my purse, and a hooded sweatshirt on. So, we decided that I was going to be famous, and the guys and Angie would be my entourage. The limo pulled up to a bar, and we all got out. I had my hood up and sunglasses on, Angie shielded me from the people standing outside the bar. I held my face down and let Angie pull me in to the bar.


People fell for it. It was perfect. When I was walking back from the bathroom, some guy shoved his camera phone in my face and snapped a picture. The girl behind him squealed “Ohmygod, she’s still trying to hide!” I don’t know who they THOUGHT I was, but it was awesome. We pulled the stunt a couple more times as we progressed to more bars. At one bar, I went to close out a tab, and the bartender asked me to sign my “receipt”. After I did it, he was like “Oh, wait. Here’s the actual receipt” and then pocketed the fake receipt. My autograph! Hahaha.

So throughout the night, I kind of got a little TOO into my concocted alter ego. I was suddenly very aware of my facial expressions, in case someone snapped a picture that would show up somewhere with the headline, “Stars: They’re Just Like Us! They pick their nose and have mascara smeared on their cheek!” I felt like everyone was looking at me, I didn’t want to go the bathrooms alone, and I just sort of felt weird. Poor Britney Spears. I now understand her pain and aversion to normal social venues. Finally, we gave up the gag, and I put my sunglasses back in my purse and shook my booty on the dance floor without a care in the world.

It was definitely fun being a “famous” person for a couple minutes. On the car ride home, I reflected on how gullible people are. Geo made a good point, though. He said “I think people just like the idea that someone famous would come into their world and share the same experiences for even one night.” It was a pretty smart statement. The limo, the entourage, the feeling of being thisclose to someone who may or may not enjoy the perks of Hollywood life seemed to intoxicate people. I just hope that a few people had at least one good story to go home and tell. I should have advertised my blog…you know, bump up the traffic.

Alas, all that fame and fast food has wore me down. I’m definitely going to sleep hard tonight. Tomorrow, it’s back to reality and a job that doesn’t include lunching at Ivy or photo shoots with Annie Leibovitz. Oh well, I think famous people crave the kind of anonymity with which I can lead my life. I better enjoy it while it lasts!

Iowa: The Land of Opportunity (And Headaches)

So tired. So very very tired. What an awesome weekend though! I was in Iowa City this weekend with my girl friends for the Hawkeye football game and, though my body angrily disagrees with me, it was like no time had passed. It was just like the good ol‘ college days again. Is that a bad thing? I don’t think so. We hit up the same tailgates, the same bars, and ran in to lots of great friends we haven’t seen in awhile. But yeah, my body thinks I’ve over-exerted myself. It wants me to open an account with AARP, not a tab at the bar.

You know what’s awesome about Iowa City? Everything. I love that place. The momentum of the city is contagious. It’s Iowa, so everything runs a little bit slower. Everyone is a little more relaxed. And the gas is super cheap there. Maybe it’s because the corn for ethanol is like, everywhere.

Okay, so after spending a total of 9 hours in car by myself this weekend, I’ve discovered quite a bit about myself. One - turns out, I’m a terrible singer. I always thought I was pretty good. I had a mix of songs that I belted out for about 15 minutes before thinking “Wow, I really can’t listen to myself anymore”. So, I turned off the music and just thought about life. Which brought up discovery number two. I am pretty good company. During the silent drive, I made myself laugh exactly 6 times. And at one point, I laughed out loud during the little internal stand-up act I had going on about what it would be like to have a conversation with a squirrel. Okay, on paper that is definitely not funny. But you should have heard the squirrel’s voice. Hilarious.

Finally, I realized that I love driving. I love it. I definitely don’t get to do it a lot, and road trips are fun. Even when you’re by yourself. I love cruise control. I love random talk radio stations talking about corn prices and the plights of farmers. I love playing the Alphabet Game. This weekend, I won every single time I played.

But I’m really tired, you guys. All that fun and debauchery wore me out. My calves hurt from standing on an incline at the Magic Bus tailgate for hours and from wearing extremely high heels all night. My liver is considering submitting its Two Week notice. And for some reason, my right ear is really sore. My hands are covered in stamps from various bars, and my hair is just, well, ugh. I’m a hot mess. Were all my Sundays like this in college? Probably. Did it ever stop me? Probably not.

Well, thanks for the memories, Iowa. Thanks for letting me crash at your place, Kelly. Thanks for making the road trip, Madeline and Freda. And thanks to all the fine people at the Magic Bus and the Sports Column for making a girl feel like she never left the immaturity and irresponsibility of college. I’ll see you all again in a few weeks. I hope you’re ready. I hope I’m ready. But now, back in real life, I’ll be working on my squirrel stand-up act. Trust me, guys, it’s gonna be great.

Anyway, how was your weekend??

List-o-mania

I’m getting ready for my solo road trip to Iowa City this weekend. I’m meeting up with Freda, Madeline, and Kelly for the U of Iowa vs. Iowa State football game, and I. Am. Stoked. In preparation for my travels, I’ve begun My Packing List. I absolutely love making lists. And since the rest of my week is pretty crazy, tonight is really the only time I have to prepare.

I’m a really bad packer. I always over pack, and not in the “I just don’t know what the weather is going to be like” kind of way. I pack 6 different pairs of shoes for two nights away because I just don’t know what I’ll feel like wearing, and I like to have options. So packing is a big job for me. But while I may bring 7 sweatshirts, I’ll forget pants. And thus the need for a List.

So far, my Packing List consists of 3 categories: Clothes, Accessories, Other Stuff. Then there are subcategories that are broken down by day. So, Friday, I’ll need these 2 pairs of pants, these 4 shirts, and these 2 pairs of black heels to choose from. And this continues on through the end of the trip. And because I forget things all the time, there are things included on there like KEYS. Really, Pharon? You really think you’ll be DRIVING to Iowa and realize you’ve forgotten your car keys? I’m impossible…

One time while packing for Mexico, I had Geo read me my list back to me so I could make sure I had everything. He read,”Okay, um…comfy jeans?” Check. “Regular jeans?” Check. “Black shirt with thing on collar?” Check. “Black shirt without thing on collar?” Check. “Thing for the night? What is that?” I said “Check” and quickly moved on. I realized at that moment that my lists are unintentionally coded. Instead of writing “my blanket” I wrote “thing for the night”, embarrassed that someone would find the list and discover that I still have my childhood blanket (another post all in itself). So besides the vague descriptions of clothes that only I can understand, I guess I also code items that I wish didn’t have to be on the list, but MUST be included out of fear of forgetting them. I remember a list I made once that had “Thing I Need” under the Miscellaneous header, which to this day I have no idea what it was. I had out-coded myself.

I don’t know what it is about lists, but I just feel incredible when I can check off items. I have about 6 lists running at any given time in my life. Right now it’s: Blogs I Must Read, Blogs I Must Write, Books I Want to Read, Gift Ideas, Target List, and a list of offensive Russian Phrases that might come in handy some day. I feel so organized! And this doesn’t include my many, many, many To Do Lists. I have a To Do list at work (two, actually), I have Things to Do This Month, Things To Do Today, and just general things I have to do in my lifetime. You know, stuff like “Understand Math”. Sometimes I’ll add items to the list after I’ve done them, just so I can check them off.

So, I’ve got my Packing List almost done. I’ve put it into 3 columns, and made all the bullets into check boxes. I can’t wait to start checking things off. Tonight, I’m going shopping with my mom and Prinna, which will be good because just now I added a header called, “Things to Buy”. A list within a list. Perfection.

Cabin Fever

I finally got a tan. All summer long, the weekends have either been rainy and gross, or suffocatingly hot. So outdoors has not been my friend. But after spending the weekend at my sister's cabin in the sunshiney perfectness, my shoulders are burnt, my nose hurts when I crinkle it in disgust, and life is very good. In said sunshiney perfectness, I spent the days learning that I am good at both shooting a BB gun and fishing. I was as surprised as your are…

I love cabins. I am very disappointed that at this point in my life, I myself do not have a cabin. Though I am not a fan of bugs, the outdoors, or doing a lot of work, there is something about cabin life that agrees with me. Cabin life is much better than home life. Both mornings, I woke up with a very awesome alarm clock. My niece, Eve, would come and put her face right next to mine and just wait for me to open my eyes. Also, the lax showering rules are great, there’s always something to do, and having a beer with breakfast is not out of the question.

And no matter which cabin I’m visiting, there are things about each one that makes me feel at home. Every bathroom has the AIM toothpaste that is in the process of expiring and the one-ply toilet paper. Every living room has a handful of year-old Good Housekeeping magazines and some crossword puzzles, and it‘s decorated with wooden-carved signs that say things like We Don‘t Skinny Dip, We Chunky Dunk. And outside has the reclining lounge chairs, the fire pits, the yard games, the giant grill, and a dock leading out to a boat. Everything at a cabin suggests relaxation at any cost.

Like cabins, I also looooove me a boat. I still don’t know how to drive one, or how I would dock it, but I am a great boat passenger. What is better than a boat? You can lay around in it, catching some rays, then just roll overboard into the water for a little relief from the heat. You can sip on a beer while towing a wake boarder through the double ups. And, like this weekend, you can just hang out, listen to music, and occasionally catch huge fish. Boats are the greatest. I really need to find a way to get a sick boat, and then I’ll just need to find a place to dock it. And learn how to drive it. And save my money for gas.

So now I’m home, my skin feels like fried chicken, all my clothes smell like a bonfire, and I’ve got more bug bites than I can count (who gets a bug bite on the outside of their pinky toe!? It’s the worst place, hands down). And I’m too pooped to write too many clever, witty remarks, but I’m definitely okay with that. Maybe I should be glad I don’t have my own cabin. I’d never get anything done, and I’d probably be too relaxed all the time to care about anything other than whether or not I should bring the hammock inside at night in case of rain.

Plus One

I spent this weekend in Two Harbors, MN at a wedding. This time, it was two of Geo’s friends from college who took the plunge. The setting was beautiful, they said their vows at this incredible lodge overlooking Lake Superior. The bride looked spectacular, the groom was dapper and composed, the food was delicious, the music was great, and overall it was an awesome wedding (sure, we sat at dinner with Geo‘s pregnant ex-girlfriend, her new husband, and her father, but all‘s well that ends well).

I’ve been to a lot of weddings. A lot. Four just for my brothers and sisters alone. There have been traditional weddings, untraditional weddings, destination weddings, and weddings that involved pull tabs. This wedding, though, was the first one I attended as simply Guest. Now don’t hate me if I’ve been in your wedding or was the primary name on the invitation, but It. Was. Awesome. It was like I was the one with the veil on, and sister, let me tell you the view was fantastic.

I know the bride and groom a little bit, and I knew about a half dozen people there. But outside of that, I was on my own. I wasn't busy taking pictures or navigating my way through throngs of family or friends, so I actually got to look around and enjoy the little details without having intimate knowledge of why they chose white napkins over pink, how much the centerpieces cost, or whether or not the music started on time. I think this was the first wedding that I actually saw the cake. I wasn’t responsible for making sure my date was not left by himself and I didn’t have to introduce him to anyone who’s name I can’t remember. I just got to drink some free beer, dance my booty off, and drink the free beer. Yeah, the drinking beer is on there twice for a reason…

To be fair though, there are moments at the wedding of a close friend or family member when you see him/her all dressed up, and it brings you to tears. You know these people are in love and choosing to be together forever, and you get choked up when they walk down the aisle as husband and wife because you are a part of that. Yeah, for the first time I wasn’t exactly a part of it. I just kept hoping I wasn’t sweating through my dress and checking out people’s shoes. My life is much the same today as it was yesterday. And it was tough not dancing the special dances, or understanding the inside jokes, and I don’t have anyone new in my family. Sure it can be stressful and expensive to be close to the bride and groom, but at the end of it all, your life is a little bit different. It’s a little bit better having that kind of love so close to you.

So there are pros and cons. But I guess what I know now is that on my wedding day, someone will take the time to appreciate the cover of the guest book, and they won‘t know or care that I went with chocolate instead of red velvet cake because it was cheaper. And I probably won’t even know who that person is. They’ll be Guest.

Smile Because it Happened

This weekend was my favorite 4th of July celebration to date. My whole family was able to stay at Faith’s Lodge in Wisconsin ( Faith's Lodge Website ). Faith’s Lodge is a ginormous cabin on 20 acres of land, and it is a place for families who are faced with the challenge of having sick children, or for families who have suffered the loss of a child. My sister Prinna and her husband Chris lost my niece Sophia to SIDS in 2007. Since then, they have been very active in raising funds for Faith’s Lodge, because it was such a special place for them to visit after losing Sophia.

So this weekend, we all got together and celebrated Sophia’s life with the dedication of a bridge in her name. Fun? Absolutely. But having my whole family together can be a bit overwhelming sometimes. There were almost 20 of us, plus 8 kids, with Chris’ family and my own. There were just some insane moments. There were costume contests, poker games, dance contests, slip n’ slides, fishing, kids were melting down left and right, crying. My little brother got a fishing hook stuck in his finger and minor surgery had to be performed in the Sun Room. My brothers and my boyfriend put on a truly spectacular fireworks show, complete with music. And there was lots of food, lots of beer, and lots of…well, everything. It was a crazy good time.

But there were 2 moments in particular that I’ll treasure for the rest of my life from this weekend. The first was when Prinna and I randomly took a paddle boat ride around the pond. Just the two of us, there wasn’t really much talking. Just kind of quiet. Peaceful. We picked flowers from the lily pads (which, oops, is like totally illegal I guess), and just sort of chilled. It was immensely important to me to share that tiny moment with Prinna at Faith’s Lodge. I felt honored to be there with her, and it really made me happy.

The second moment was when I was tasked with decorating the bridge before the ribbon cutting ceremony. I went to town with the yellow crepe paper, purple ribbons, and balloons. I was down at the bridge alone, and there could not have been more mosquitoes, the threat of ticks was everywhere, and it was a zillion degrees. But there I was, standing on the bridge by myself. Thinking of Sophia. Missing her. And I looked around me, and there were dozens and dozens of rocks that parents paint for their beloved children and put them around the bridge. Names of babies, dates of their passing, special words from their parents. I didn’t know any of them, but nestled by a tree was Sophia’s. Among all those rocks, all those names, I did know one of them. I just missed her so much.

But then the ribbon cutting ceremony started, and the whole group of us stood together and remembered Sophia, and honored her life. It was incredibly moving. I thought, as I looked around, how lucky I am. Twelve hours ago, all these people were dancing around a room together, laughing, singing, and being together. And it was all because of Sophia. We all came together for her, and we had fun. We cried, yes, but we celebrated too.

I encourage you, dear reader, to find moments like this. To look around and remember how special the people in your life are. And when you find yourself on a bridge, sad and alone, remember that you can cross over it. And my hope for you is that you’ll find a whole mess of people who make you smile.

Oh, yeah, one more thing. Happy B-day, America. You rock. Thanks for the freedom. :)